"See you in another life, brother." -- Desmond Hume

I miss LOST.  Already, I miss it. 

I know it seems retarded.  it's just a show, right?  But we're talking about an attachment.  I've been involved with and loved this show since long before my husband.  In fact, I think I was married to my ex when the pilot aired. 

When I was single, and broke, I had LOST to look forward to.  It was on regualr old channel 8, which was awesome because it was impossible to afford cable sans child support.  Being a single mother to a 2 year-old doesn't offer a great deal of "Me Time", but that hour was my sanctuary.  I watched LOST and wrapped myself up in the warm blankie of a pretend world of mystery and religious undertones for an hour every week {yes, including reruns} for 6 years.  Then when the DVD collections came out, I'd watch an entire season in a weekend. 

I love it.  The Easter eggs of info, the connections of the survivors, the way the numbers are everywhere, the famous last names of the characters intermingling with the props on the set, and most of all... the relatable stories of the people.  Claire's fear of being a mom and not knowing what she's doing.  I get that.  Kate's need to run from everything.  I get that.  Jack's insecurities, Lock's need to believe in something bigger, Charlie's struggle to overcome something bigger than himself... all of that... I get it.

And so I love them.  All of them.  Even the ones I hated.   

So watching it end... pushing play on my DVR and knowing it'd be the last time I sat in eager waiting for the story to unfold... it was stressful.  I genuinely feel a great deal of anxiety.  What's left?  That was my thing.  There's an emptiness. 

Again, I know, I know..... it's just a show.  But I have this unnatural addiction to it.  An addictive personality that clings to soft addictions.  TV shows, specific foods, etc.  Thanks to my Behavioral Therapist (who was supposed to be helping me deal with a cancer diagnosis) who basically said there's no changing it.  Just avoiding damaging things that could get out of control.  So while I should avoid making a habit of drinking, smoking, getting piercings, or taking prescription {or non) drugs, I don't think being "addicted" to a TV can hurt.

Until it's over.

Now I feel like I've just gone through a bad break up.  But, in keeping with the show's theme... it's time to let go.  Which I suppose I have no choice in.  :(  But, while I respect beyond words, the writer's decision to end the show before it became bent out of shape and meaningless, I reserve the right to selfishly want more. 

I loved the Finale.  I thought it was hokey, at times.  Yes.  Goodbyes are like that sometimes.  People who didn't grasp the point of the show will tell you they didn't like it.  That they still need answers.  And I think that's sad.  The point of the show in to provoke thought.  It's not a show for idiots.  Use your imagination.  Ponder.  Think.  Pretend.  Just enjoy the mystery.  Who, in their lifetime, EVER has all the answers?!  No one!  This show isn't about being lost on an island.  It's about people lost in their lives.  I, for one, will enjoy going back and watching them ALL again... just to ponder the questions that linger. 

Farewell, beloved LOST!  You are Epic and Genuine and you stand proudly alone in a mass of semi-funny sitcoms, a zillion cop shows, reality tv and just plain crap {yes, I realize the last 2 were redundant}.